Harold the imp is going to be an audio book, in production as we speak!!
Took a hiatus from posting for a little while due to the birth of my son, but stories will soon be added in the Ultimate Vampire storyline.
Keep an eye out!
Today Is a Very Nice Day
Down by the winding river bank
Arose a mighty debate among the creatures
Who lived along its eastern flank.
It was raining, you see
A drizzle, a shower
Drippy drops dropping on every blade and flower.
As the Spider crawled under a dry green leaf,
Curling into a ball as far as it could get
The Squirrel went into its tree- hole with grief
Already sopping wet.
When out of nowhere came a voice with an announcement:
“Today is a very nice day!”
All the creatures looking for shelter heard it say.
The Owl asked, “Who just said that, the fool?”
“Why it’s me, the Toad,” he said, sitting on a toadstool.
“How is it good? My feathers are drenched!” was the Owl’s retort.
“Yes but it’s good in some sort.”
“How so, how so?” asked the Owl so wise.
The Toad thought it over while eating some flies.
“It’s better for hopping, it’s better for shopping…for flies that is.”
“It’s better for being able to move about,
And making sure my skin doesn’t dry out.
I live in the water and on the wet ground.”
“Yes but I don’t!” said the Owl with a frown.
“I live in the trees and on branches and twigs,
“And I eat berries and berries and berries and figs.”
“They need the rain too” said the Toad, “you know.
They need it to help them grow.”
At this moment the Fish chimed in
With a fish-eating grin,
“Well in my opinion I first should state,
I live in water and I think it’s great!
My food is here, every harvest and grain,
And I have a home thanks to the rain.”
“My home is gone because of it too!”
Said the Chipmunk, beginning to stew.
“Not to mention it fluffs up my tail!”
“But it makes me go faster,” interjected the Snail.
At that moment the rain stopped!
The sun began to shine.
“Ah,” the Owl said. “It’s about time!”
“Today IS a very nice day!”
“I’m not sure I like the Sun,”
Said the Mushroom. “It is no fun.”
The Bat winced. “I really hate the light,”
“Which is why I only fly at night.”
The Gopher climbed out of its earthy abode
And smiled a mocking smile at the Toad.
The Bird chirped, “This is far far better I think.”
But the Otter disagreed-
“A few days of this and there’ll be nothing to drink!”
“How to settle this debate?”
roared the Owl.
“I know- wait!
Let us go ask the Bee.”
“Okay Toad, I agree.”
“But what’s this, the Bee’s not home!”
“Of course, he’s in the honeycomb!”
“Hello, hello, yellow Bee,
Can you come down for me?”
The Bee buzzed down to the pair.
“I know your questions but they’re not fair,”
Said the Bee.
“Why don’t you go ask the Tree?
He yearns for both sun and for the rain.”
“I’ve been listening to you all,”
Said the Tree. “And to me it’s all the same.
A Seed needs water to grow, with time
And once a Sapling it needs sunshine.
When a grown-up it becomes,
It provides shelter from the sun.
It offers fruit to eat and a place to live
It takes and takes and gives and gives.
What’s good for you is good for me.
And what’s good for the Tree is good for the Seed,
So yes it is a nice day, a very nice day indeed.”
Help back my new small tale, which is a short novel called Harold the Imp. I’ve launched a Kickstarter campaign at http://kck.st/MVNAH8. It’s going to be published as both an eBook and a print book, and I’m asking for a small amount of funding to make it happen!
Thanking you very deeply in advance,
In the year 1439 in the Bohemian forest on January 2nd, King Sabrian declared the second day of every year “Day of the Imps”, in honor of the Imp king.
The human kingdom of Mansfield paid tribute to the Imp kingdom of Monello, by celebrating a day of mischief and prankish behavior. There was a small twist in the celebration, however. Unlike April Fools Day, people did not play pranks on one another but instead on themselves, to the amusement of any witnesses.
Historically, it was to give imps a “day off”, so they wouldn’t have to work for the outcomes they sought. Instead of planning, setting up and playing tricks, they could drop by and poke their heads into people’s lives, and be entertained for free.
Some people did mundane things on Imp Day, like switching their sugar and salt- thereby ruining their tea and anything they baked. Others did more elaborate things, like throwing eggs at their own cottages, or “accidentally” forgetting to park their horses, thereby losing them to the surrounding forest.
The mandate was that whatever prank was pulled, it must be something good-natured and funny to an observer. For imps can make themselves invisible, and you never truly know when they are not there. But if you pull a good prank on yourself, you’re likely to hear a stifled chuckle off in the distance, since it is said imps can sense impending laughter.
So the appropriate question is: how will you celebrate Imp Day?
One day through the forest of the Wayward Wood,
A prince rode his steed and wore a dark hood.
He strode away, far far from his castle,
Away from the marriage which he thought was a hassle.
A wife betrothed to, not chosen by, his hand,
To rule alongside him one day all the land.
When he chanced to ride past a maiden near a brook,
Who wept so loudly and violently that she shook.
“Excuse me, my lady” he approached near the stream,
“But those tears coming down make your eyes gleam.
What is the meaning of all this sadness?
Surely you can find a reason to rejoice with gladness?”
“I’m sorry good sir, that you must see me this way,”
She cried aloud. “I’m not having a good day.
You see I’m a witch and my coven cast me out.”
His eyes widened.
“What is that all about?”
At the question she wailed til it subsided to sobs.
“I apologize if my question is a burglar that robs-
If I’m overstepping by asking, if I’m being nosy.”
She shook her head.
“My my, your cheeks are quite rosy.”
“No sir I do not mind if you ask me my trouble,
Especially not after they burst my bubble.”
“What bubble is that, good lady, good witch?”
“That I’m ugly of course,” she said with a twitch.
“Indeed, with many a gruesome flaw.”
At that the prince dropped his jaw. “Come again?”
“I never fit in with the looks of my sisters,”
“They were able to land so many misters.”
“Is that so?”
“I haven’t a wart, a crooked nose or even a bulbous chin!”
“Thank goodness again!”
“Without such beauty, in life I cannot win.”
Depressed, she sat down near the stream bed
And left the hooded prince scratching his hooded head.
“Their skins are all vomit-green and bumpy,
Mine is smooth and in no way lumpy.”
“And that’s bad?”
“My teeth are all straight and white and even,”
“I can’t get them yellow no matter how often I clean them.
Their disgust and disdain powers their magic”
“You see, I find that quite tragic.”
“But they don’t- they’re happy and successful and active-
My sense of humor and personality are so unattractive!”
The prince removed his hood and went to where she sat
She looked at his crown and asked, “what is that, a hat?”
He took her in his arms and gave her true love’s first kiss.
He looked into her eyes and said, “What? Is something amiss?”
“Why did you kiss me, stranger? What did you do?”
“The witches must have put a spell on you,
To make you blind to how beautiful and wonderful you are,
Your light and your smile outshines any star.
It would be my honor if you rode with me.”
“Where are we riding?” she asked with glee.
“Away from something?”
“No. Towards it. Let’s go!
Together we ride, together we glow.”
And onward they rode and were happy ever after- no less,
And lived in love as prince and princess.
I’m Invisible, I’m Invisible! The girl I like doesn’t see me.
I’m invisible! What a thunderous woe it is to be me!
When I see her I melt
Like ice cream in summer.
If I told her how I felt
It might turn into a bummer.
I hope she likes me too!
Or learns my name at least.
Or notices my smile too,
Or says hello at least.
When I see her I always get nervous
The butterflies in my stomach all a-circus
Juggling and clowning and running and clowning!
She makes me smile, she gives me pain,
The ache of love is such a strain.
It tugs my heart ‘til it’s a noose,
And every bit of strength has broken loose.
I love her laugh and her beaming smile
I wish she would talk to me a while
We can chat about her favorite things…
I could look into her eyes,
Her beautiful green…blue…brown eyes?
Maybe I don’t know her as much as I think…
Maybe I don’t- doesn’t that stink?
I know she’s never a mess,
I love her striped…polka dot dress?
What is it about her that I love?
Her eyes, her smile, all of the above?
Through some hard thinking, I think I see
That maybe she’s the one invisible to me.
Love can be selfish, love can be kind
But maybe it’s a road I have to find!
I think each and every one of you would agree,
I have to see her before she can see me.
Floating, bobbing, flowing with the scene
Swimming, flying, through the colors of a dream.
Everything is possible and nothing is off limits.
A lifetime can be lived in only five minutes!
Magic exists in the centers of all places
In the breath of the air and in the smiles on all faces.
When you know you’re in a dream you can make the world bend,
And put things together in a well-fitting blend.
The power is great when you’re dreaming,
Contorting, twisting and scheming
So that things aren’t always how they ought to be,
Things are different in reality.
Then a rumble like a distant quake,
Sounds an alarm and brings us awake.
By the time we hit the Snooze
The dream we had has become old news!
But leaves us with a certain sense
That it hasn’t really left and hence,
It isn’t really gone,
But in our mind all along.
Deep inside of you and I
Is a world we make where we can fly
Where we sink or swim based on how we feel,
And both our fears and desires are real.
Wouldn’t it be great to always live there?
But would it be great? Would it be fair?
How would we know about light and dark?
How would we know without a spark?
Good and bad don’t live in a dream,
They live in the world, in every action and stream.
Where it rains and sun shines on everyone you meet,
Whether nice or not, on High or Low Street.
The world is where we learn what makes us happy or sad,
Sappy or glad, argyle or plaid, snappy or bad.
And when the day is done time comes to retrieve,
All the things that life gives us to trim and to weave.
Drifting off to ourselves, away it would seem,
To make for ourselves, for us a new dream.